West Lancashire Womens Refuge

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Women and Domestic Violence
The Women's Aid Federation of England has produced guidelines regarding "Health and Domestic Violence: a life and death issue". Outlining the following issues:

Why don't abused women leave?

Women stay in violent relationships for years for reasons ranging from love to terror:
She may have nowhere else to go and a lack of knowledge about what help is available.
She may still care about her partner and hope they will change.
She may feel ashamed about what has happened or believe that its her own fault.
She may be scared that he will try to kill her or her children if she tries to leave or seek help.
She may be scared of the future, where will she go, what will she do for money, will she have to hide forever, what will happen to the children.

Why doesn't she tell someone?

Fears of not being believed or being judged.
Fear that you will blame her.
Fear that the violence will worsen if outsiders get involved.
Worry about her future if she leaves, she may think she will not be able to cope, or may be financially dependant on her abuser.
Guilt, shame or because she's made to feel that she's responsible for the violence.
She may still love her partner, and hope that he will change.
Cultural reasons that prevent her from disclosing the abuse.
Fear that her children will be taken into care.

Other Facts

A women is abused every 15 seconds. (Bureau of justice statistics, Report to the nation on Crime and Justice. The Data. Washington DC Office of Justice Program, US Dept. of Justice. Oct 1983)
Women of all cultures, races, occupations, income levels, and ages are abused - by husbands, boyfriends, lovers and partners. (Surgeon General Antonia Novello, as quoted in Domestic Violence: Battered Women, publication of the reference department of the Cambridge Public Library, Cambridge, MA)
Almost half (44%) of all incidents reported by women to the British Crime Survey were domestic violence incidents. (British Crime Survey 1996, home office).
A survey of 484 women in Surreys shopping centres found that 1 in 4 defined themselves as having suffered domestic violence from a male partner or ex-partner since the age of 18 years. (Nicola Dominy & Lorraine Radford (1996) Domestic Violence in Surrey: towards an effective inter-agency response, Surrey social services/Roehampton Institute).
A survey of 1000 women in city centres in North England found that 1 in 8 women reported having been raped by their husbands or partners (Painter, K. (1991) Wife Rape And The Law Survey Report: key findings and recommendations, department of social policy & social work, University of Manchester).
As many as 1 in 3 marriages that end in divorce involve domestic violence (Borkowski, Murch & Walker (1983) Marital Violence, Tavistock).
Repeat victimisation is common. Half of all victims of domestic violence are involved in incidents more than once (British Crime Survey 1996 Home Office).
60% of 127 women resident in refuges in Northern Ireland experienced violence during pregnancy. 13% lost their babies as a result (Monica Mcwillians & Joan Mckiernan (1993) Bringing It Out Into The Open, Belfast HMSO).

Children and Domestic Violence

In 90% of incidents involving domestic violence, the children are in the same or the next room (Hughes, 1992).
Children sometimes feel guilty if they do not come to the aid of their mother. The 'guilt' is often accompanied by self-blame and feelings that they have in some way 'caused' their father to be violent (Saunders, 1995).
Common 'adjustment difficulties' among children who witness domestic violence include: increased levels of anxiety, psychosomatic illnesses, including: headaches, abdominal complaints, asthma, peptic ulcers, rheumatoid arthritis, stuttering, enuresis; sadness, withdrawal and fear; lower rating in social competence, particularly for boys; a reduction in understanding social situations including thoughts and feelings of people involved (Jaffe et al, 1990).
Children of abused women will not necessarily grow up to be abusers or victims of domestic violence themselves. No conclusive evidence exists to support the 'intergenerational transmission of violence' thesis or to show that there is a 'cycle of violence' (Mullender & Morley, 1994).